Christmas Jell-O

Category: Humour

When I was a boy we were too poor to own a Christmas tree so my dad would load us up into his station wagon and take us the to the Christmas Jell-O lot.

On the way over we would pass the Christmas tree lot and my father would sigh wistfully ‘maybe another year.’

When we got to the Christmas Jell-O lot a man clapping his heavy mitts to keep warm would come out of his pickup-truck and cut up a nice piece of green Christmas Jell-O then help my dad tie it to the roof of the car.

We’d take it home and lean it against the living room wall, then decorate it, and hang lights on it . At the top we would hang a shining star.

Later we would put on ‘A Charlie Brown Christmas’ and sing ‘Oh! Christmas Jell-O, Oh! Christmas Jell-O’ along with Snoopy. We pretended to flip our feet and howl at the star radiating on top of the Christmas Jell-O, just as Snoopy howled at his Christmas tree.

On Christmas morning we would hurry to the living room and see of all kinds of presents under the Christmas Jell-O.

We would unwrap each gift in a hurry then, afterward, we would run around the house holding a toy airplane up in the air humming "Ni-Rowrrrr!" or tote a plastic handgun shouting "Bang! Bang!"

At dinner we would eat turkey and I would look at the green Christmas Jell-O with its star shining brightly at the top.

After about two weeks my dad would put the Christmas Jell-O by the curb for pickup. There were other Christmas Jell-Os by the curbside but ours was always the nicest.

With every Christmas we looked forward to the Christmas Jell-O and we would scarcely notice the spruce trees or the fir trees on the way to get another Christmas Jell-O.

No. For us, nothing could beat the Christmas Jell-O sitting on top of my dads station wagon, casting its pale green glow under the cold winter moon.

And so, as Tiny Tim observed, God bless Us, Every One!